Thursday, August 18, 2011

A Personal Post

I hadn't posted for a little bit and thought I should update everyone on Dakota. He had a few rough days last week. Had some sickness and a lot of sleeping. His appetite has remained strong and is still about to eat us out of the house, but we are happy about that. I started thinking a lot about this blog and what I wanted to share. If you know our family then you know that we are a very private family. We felt called to do this and share our story. We don’t share our story to get sympathy. I worried that people would think that we were doing this to get attention. If you know us then you know that we are the type of family that stays in the background and not big sharers. Not sure who this blog is supposed to touch or reach but I know that we are meant to do this.

I also didn’t want people to think that this has all been sunshine and flowers for us. We are relying on our faith to get us through but to say that we haven’t had our doubts would be wrong. When we first heard about the possibility of cancer we were terror stricken and just kept hoping for a healthy outcome. David was and still is my rock through it all. When we found out that there was a possibility of cancer David was in a little bit of denial that this could happen to our family. He kept saying “God wouldn’t give you a child with cancer.” My greatest fear in life is cancer. My mother, grandmother, grandfather, and step-grandfather all died of cancer. I haven’t had a family member survive cancer. I always thought that it would be me or one of my siblings that would get cancer but never one of my children. David and I have been able to talk openly about our feelings and fears with each other and one day I was telling David that I didn’t know why God would give my child cancer when he knows that is my biggest fear. I was able to answer myself and knew that God was going to show me that cancer can be beat and it’s not a death sentence. I always wondered how David and I would do if something big happened to one of our children. How would we be together? We now know that we are even stronger than we thought. When I am weak he is strong and vice versa. Through it all we have looked for the lessons learned in all of this and first and foremost is our faith and what it can withstand. I know great blessings come out of great hardships and they are always there if your eyes are open.

1. I have a son and family that inspires me in so many ways.
2. I have a marriage that sustains even in the toughest of times.
3. I have family and friends that have surrounded us in prayers, offers of help, and well wishes.
4. God’s got this. His plans are better than we could ever dream.

What more can a person ask for?

A little about Dakota; not once have I seen him get depressed, ask “why me?” or show anything other than a strong spirit. David had posted on his FB wall that he always wanted to be Dakota’s hero and instead Dakota is his. I see people ask Dakota how he is and he always says “I’m good” even when he’s not good. I know that God has big plans for Dakota and he is open to those possibilities. I am excited to see what is in store for his life.

What do I hope to accomplish with this blog? I have no idea. Maybe you know someone who is or will face Hodgkin’s Lymphoma and you can send them here to see how one family dealt with it. Who knows? God does.

Here is a picture of Dakota and his sister Paige at his treatment last Friday. Dakota said that the paparazzi wasn’t there so David only took one picture. No worries though, Mom will be back on the job next Wednesday - Friday. See you then!

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